“No! means No! If you won’t stop crying and screaming, I will punish you Hard”. This is how you can imagine a yelling or angry mom who is trying teach some discipline to their kid.
Losing mind is very a natural behaviour which we see in any parent. It is not by choice but some where we lack the patience to make our kids understand.
When I was small my parents usually did the same where me and my sister were scared of my dad. Till date me and my sister discuss the same with my dad and ask him the reason that “Why was he so strict with us”. His answer was simple “I wanted to teach my kids proper discipline of society”. I feel in olden days yelling was only a means to communicate with there kid.
Yelling and shouting only makes our kid to be scared by us. They try to have emotional break down if we scare them by yelling.
I know it’s not easy and the cases might differ from individual kid’s too. I have also gone through this phase and believe me it made me feel like as if I am “bad mother” or have “high BP”. So I tried to change the way of handling the tantrums of my kid.
Kids are meant to throw tantrums because till age of 5 it’s very difficult for them to adjust and understand the norms of life. They only express through there anger, crying or by showing any form of aggression which we feel like a tantrum.
In such situation try to be calm and handle with peace. Try to understand the reason why are they irritated and handle with calm mind.
Let them vent out all there emotions, when the kid settles in talk to them calmly. The point is when you are also calm and the kid than it is easy to communicate and teach them that they were wrong.
When the Kid is irritated and even, we direct them with anger than they become more adamant. They start hating us rather loving. Once this tendency grows than till the maturity age they will remember you as a bad parent.
Always there will be a way out. Yelling and Shouting is not a solution. They will understand you when they also calm down. Keep patience this is the first step to tackle them.
Ignorance is a Bliss.
I know things can’t be handled with calm mind all the time. Sometimes we need to ignore if the things move up from our head. There was a incident where my daughter use to cry for chocolates it’s like demanding for more. So I started ignoring her demand.
Try to ignore the things once or twice. Eventually they will realize that we are not listening and they will try to stop their tantrums.Ignoring things will check your patience, as kids take there own time to settle in the situation.
Rules are Rules.
When the topic comes for teaching discipline and manners to kid’s we have to follow few rules which implies to both parent and kid.
- Try to appreciate by a reward when your kid behaves properly in a crowd.
- Try to make them understand the good and bad way behaving in front of others.
- Stop them not yell on them when you feel they are wrong and ask them calmly for the reason.
- Analyse why is kid upset, it might be due to lack of sleep, hunger pranks or they really might not be well.
Try to follow certain pattern, try to be consistent. First rule is handle with calm mind just don’t give up. Understand they are just kids who don’t know the manners or discipline of the society. It’s just us who wants to make them perfect. As time passes by they will understand it.
Read More : 6 Ways to Discipline Kids without Yelling.